Hey Bud !
Thanks for wanting to take the time out to write me .
I'm humbled and honored ! Feel free to rant and rave !
Never feel uncomfortable about the size or content
of your mail , I'm not out to judge anybody .
Write me two words or a novel about you or whatever ,
I'm a firm believer in :
"The more I know about you , the more I know about myself ! "

But please do not send me any kind of chain letter .
If it states "send to 10 people..." ,
or "send to everyone you know " ,
it's a friggin' chain letter , got it ?
I don't care if Bill Gates will come
a-knockin' on my door to blow me ,
or how many little girls' legs got chopped off ,
send it to someone who gives a flyin' fuck !
And please no jokes or other cute shit
you've stumbled upon via the web !
I get enough laughs lookin' at your Momma !
Yea , I know , I'm a picky little shit .

I will try to answer all e-mail .
It may take while , I get lots of mail .
Don't be suprised if it takes eight months to reply .
I'm a busy man . Busy pickin' my ass , that is !

Some of you clowns supplied an invalid return address ,
e-mail gets lost on my 0.2 browser ,
but most of all , my feeble little Dog mind can't recall
who the hell I've written back to or not !
Grampa needs your patience and persistence ...

If you have profound words for me , send them here :
dirtdogfla@hotmail.com

If you have a hankerin' to send me pix , naughty or nice ,
Send the suckers here :
dirtdog@eudoramail.com
or here :
dirtdogfla@bigfoot.com

Thanks for your time , bub...